Gsyfuy

I work at Mega Large Software Company Inc.

A year ago I was a new hire and very unhappy with my position, so I interviewed around internally in this massive company.

I had major anxiety issues at the time (panic disorder).

In one interview, I crashed and burned on a softball question, hard. Like panic attack, stammering, unable to comprehend what the interviewer was asking, etc. I was the last person on Earth you'd want on your team. Horribly, horribly embarrassing. What made it worse is this interviewer was not the type who made the interviewee relaxed and comfortable; his style was more "push hard and see if the interviewee can take it, or crumbles." And I crumbled like none before.

The same day I got an email from the manager, just your classic "We're going with someone more suited for the position."

A year later, I'm still in my original position but loving it now. I was promoted twice. The panicking is over. Things are good. Except the team I interviewed with is now merging with my team. And I'm soon going to be working directly with this interviewer who witnessed me crash and burn, and who denied me a position in the same company we both still work in...

Our teams are going to be "meeting each other for the first time" next week. When I meet this fellow, I'm trying to determine what approach to take:

1. Don't ask don't tell. I won't bring it up first, but if he mentions it I'll say "yeah, we have met before, good to be working with you."


2. Be proactive and direct and confident. Upon meeting: "Hey, nice to see you again! Remember me? Last time didn't go so well. This time will be better."

Two is the obvious choice here, right?

I have another option for you. Be:

• proactive;


• confident;


• smart: do not place yourself in a position of inferiority if it is not needed.

You know, I am the "special" guy with the panic, remember?

is never the good way to connect to people - especially in your situation now.

What happened years ago happened years ago. Just interact with the person like you interact with anyone else.

IF the person reminds you about the "panic" situation, acknowledge it, smile, make a comment about it being in the past.

NOTES:

• you can always improve about being stronger, both physically and mentally; you can learn to control your emotions and panic - as you already learned;


• there is always a chance that you will panic again in the future; do not fret about it, it can happen to anyone; learn to get over it gracefully;


• some people just enjoy "crushing" other people. Learn to no not give in to the crushing.

There's a quote from the Street Fighter film which sums it up:

For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me, it was Tuesday.

The problem with bringing it up first is that you're likely to be reminding them of something that they'd forgotten about. I've interviewed people before and once the decision's made about not offering them the job, I tend to forget what happened in the interview. The manager may not have even noticed the performance as much as you think - I know I'm my own worst critic and blow things out of proportion in my mind that other people around me don't even notice.

Just because it was an important time for you, doesn't mean it stuck in their memory.

Don't say anything at all. There's no point in bringing up things that happened in the past. You don't want to make the interviewer think that you've been thinking about it all this time.

You've reached the same level as the interviewer is and you are in a role you are happy doing.

If they they mention it you have two options:

A) Joke about it.

B) Acknowledge it and brush it off

This completely depends on your personality. Neither of which are either good or bad, just conversation. Remember you don't owe this person anything, take personal joy that you reached the same level but it doesn't need to be brought up.

I'd go with 2, but don't do it in front of more than a couple of people, ideally one/some of your existing team.

If you don't get it over with you'll be avoiding this fellow for months.

Start off with a handshake, and "Oh yeah, it didn't go so well last year, did it? {shrug} I suppose everyone has off days". Then move the conversation forward. When asked about it (by others in the newly formed group), be honest - "Yeah, I was going through a bad time, and probably shouldn't have been interviewing. All good now."

It depends on your personality, the company culture and how do you want to frame your next relationship with him.

If you just want to be casual and have a somewhat nice relationship with him, I would just break the ice with your second option. Specially since now you are at a higher position than before and you have proved that you have what it takes to hold a job in the company.

On the other hand, if you are socially awkward, and just want a dry, just work related, serious relationship with him, I would just let it be and not say anything. Anyways, your work and day to day interactions are going to be more than enough to prove him you are not a worthless crazy coworker and you will earn his respect with time.

Just don't fake anything. Do what you are more confortable doing.